The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

C. and I spoke today about our experience with foster care for a group of foster parents in training. We were recommended, we were told, because our social worker thinks we’re pretty cool. The lady in charge said we could share every aspect of our experience including the good, the bad, and the ugly side of foster parenting. I feel like we missed sharing so much. We were rushing a bit because neither of us likes speaking in front of a group and there were a ton of people there. So I thought I’d post here our experience. I am always trying to recruit people (if they show any interest). It has been an experience we had to jump into without over thinking. I mean life is about experiences, right? If something doesn’t work, you can change it. I’m so glad we did it. We wouldn’t have the knowledge or be the people we are today if we hadn’t done it. Here is a recap of our experience so far:

The Good
Getting to know the children.
Helping them when they need it.
Teaching them how to make good choices.
Sharing “the first” moments…I got to see our foster son’s face on his first plane trip.
Connecting with others in the community.
Having fun doing family activities.
Taking pride in the children’s accomplishments.
Rocking sweet babies to sleep at night.
Gaining understanding about the diversity of people.

The Bad
Dealing with DFAC’s bureaucracy.
Trying to get in touch with social workers when they don’t call you back.
Staying up all night with a crying baby when you have no idea what comforts them.
A child saying they don’t have to follow your rules because you’re not their real parents.

The Ugly
Getting attached and then having to say goodbye.
Social workers not giving you a chance to say goodbye.
Never knowing what happens to the children when they leave you.